|
SubscriptionsSites I Read
|
|
|
|
| the beat of my own tune.
it has no name..
it has no shape...
it shows no emotion....
and it portrays no character...
it is just a beat...
just a heartbeat...
but lemme describe what it once was.
it was colorful.
it was full of laughter...
it was once a happy soul.
playing in the sandbox...
having tea parties.. and dressing up....
eventually consumed by drugs, alcohol, and tears.
parties and new friends, and major dilemmas.
poisoned with sadness...and stricken with hate..
oh and bands like hawthorne heights.
slowly but shurely this beat has faded away..
slipped into a sink hole..
on the other side of the box.
now trapped inside is nothing left but a broken beat..
and rippled beat...
a scratched beat
more like a scratched led zeppelin record.
[ew. pain to my ears.]
and finding out there is no way
no way to replace it with a colorful beat again
no way to bring the laughter back.
and no way to shape a new character.
just a black box...with a black beat ...
trapped inside.
and the colorful beats....
looking in to see what soon might come...
what soon might be..
hoping for a way to avoid it...
but there comes a day where you can't....
and that black beat consumes you....
like the black death among Europe...
and that is how i can describe it.
| | |
|
Looking up at the world i see before me. Looking up at every specific
detail on that blade of grass. the grooves, the colors, the life. the
colors that surround me, showing me life and death. walking through it
all... shows me a maze. maze of life? maze of death? maze of
concentration? then one day i find myself traveling on the concrete.
never have i felt so small. never have i felt so out of place. a world
i have never seen before. an adventure that never once crossed my mind.
the road is soo long. and i thought the grass would never end! Let me
call this the rocky terrain. THE ALPS., MT. EVEREST [ without the cold
temperatures].
i
realize now that there are continuous explorations, adventures, and
oppurtunities. yet there are soo many roads to travel, and i never know
which one to go down. good or bad? For years now i have traveled
through these blades of grass. they showed me treacherous conditions,
and yet some expeditions contained UTTER serenity. Seveteen years of
this. then one day i found myslef a new road. losing one adventure,
but in turn gaining another. so do i continue towards the rocky
mountains, or do i steer back towards the blades of grass? So far the
rockies aren't too bad. but lemme say... i will miss every one of those
blades, whether or not i like them...... | | |
| San Francisco. What a trip.
i would have to say that city is a drug within itself.
Anyway...
let me start.
i
really have no friends. no friends to relate to, no friends i can
really trust. no one who really shows me true respect. i mean unless
you consider respect all these so called 'Friends' coming over to my
house, eating all my food, smoking all my ganja, begging for more and
more, asking me for more and more, begging for rides, take take
take...and never give in return. i mean it has finally got to the point
where the one i trusted the most has let me down, and has done what i
never expected.
i have fully figured out the true meaning of
disrespect. i mean it is shoved in my face countless times each day.
drama has consumed every activity i take part in.
i have changed
soo much for these people. to stop their complaints, to stop their
anger. and im sorry but i cannot fucking change anymore. i am done
changing. i am finally getting used to me.
they don't really even
give a shit about me. i mean truly they can care less. it's all about
you isn't it. and the worst part is....to come to the realization, that
your friends just use you and abuse you...and make you cry...and can
really give a shit...just as long as they have a ride , drugs, a party
to go to....etc. especially when you realize this at the wrong time.
what have i ever really done to all of you that makes you think i have no feelings.
do you just have no remorse for the shit you do to me.
no....you don't
you are so fucking selfish..
ALL ABOUT ME!
you know it.
that is what it really is about.
you are over dramatic
you are soo fucking rude.
and it is always the same with you...the same exact problem.
and you know what's funny...
i have spent months trying to change to satisfy you...
yet you have done nothing ..... nothing at all.
the same problem
the same problem
the same problem
the same problem
the same problem
and i always feel soo bad about saying no...and sticking up for myself...and i don't know how to conquer that problem
and
you know....all of you know...that until i do figure that out..you will
trample all over me and be horrible to me....and use me and push me
down...just to your advantage.
and you know me.....
i will just take it,
and you know it.
but you will do it anyway...just as long as you get what you need out of me.
but you will do it anyway...just as long as you get what you need out of me.
but you will do it anyway...just as long as you get what you need out of me.
but you will do it anyway...just as long as you get what you need out of me.
but you will fucking do it anyway | | |
| fury and hate in your eyes
eyes that show emotion
emotion that is let loose
words that have deep meaning
meaning that wasn't meant
think before you say it
it always comes out wrong
wrong to have such an anger
anger which is strong
in the end it's just a regret
regret the choices you made
made without a thought
a thought that went awry
a thought that made you cry
anger is just mixed up
mixed up in a bottle
the bottle finally open
opens and spills everywhere
everywhere you hoped it wouldn't go
wouldn't go all over yourself
yourself that is angered.
| | |
| Are friends more forgivable than foes?
if a foe does something hurtful towards you, and your friend does the same thing, would you automatically forgive your friend and bring pain upon your foe..??
what's the difference between a foe and a friend? They're both people, they both have feelings, and they both hold mistakes. So why is it easier to forgive a friend rather than a foe? What makes them a foe in the first place..?? Isn't it just stupid drama anyways...??
why are people fucked up...??
| | |
|
